Day 7: Fire alarm at 3 am

Last night, the power in the entire apartment went off. As of right now, It’s been more than 24 hours, and they are still working on getting it back on. I wrote the following paragraphs at 3 am yesterday as I waited outside the building along with other sleepy residents for the firemen to arrive and give clearance. Some things I wrote on the spot, and then my thoughts evolved after a few moments and continued to do so even the following day, so I added them to the relevant sections. I just thought it’s funny how quickly your thoughts and attitudes can change.

• I feel really alone in this – Then, watching all these people, I don’t think I’m alone. As in, I’m not alone in being alone. Everyone stands alone in the end.
• People are idiots. Some people have decided to drive out, and there are people who are still inside, looking down from the balcony as the alarm continues to shriek. And one lady goes, “Are we walking up the stairs”? In complaint. ‘Yes, Miss, the entire building has no power, and it was like that for the whole night, and there has been a potential fire; it is an unusual circumstance, I mean, you came down the stairs from whichever floor you are on; What did you expect?’ Something like this raced through my mind – and then, next morning, when I realised there was still no power and the elevator was still not working; I found myself asking the same question in the same tone as that lady from last night. “Do I have to walk up the stairs again?” 
• ‘Could the fire service possibly arrive any slower?’ – But then they got out of their trucks, and I saw that they were humans who had chosen to risk their lives to save others in the middle of the night. So I just thanked them internally.
• There are so many different people living in this apartment…let alone..in this world. Of all ages, ethnicities and backgrounds. And we all live in this apartment. How can we all live together peacefully in this world? What do we do with all of our differences? Is it too big? Can we overcome it? Should we overcome it?
• 입구 옆에 서있는 트렌치 코트입은 고운 흰머리의 할머니를 보니 나와 이 모든 사람들의 피할 수 없는 운명이 생각났다. 사실 엄마가 먼저 생각났다. 엄마한테 잘해야겠다는 어렴풋한 생각. 이제 아빠도 생각나네. 정섭이도, 승미언니도, 반디도.
• 근데 제일 처음 생각난 사람이 있었네. 이 모든 생각들 훨씬 전에. 
• It’s funny how the paragraph about people being idiots is the longest one.
• You need to practice being yourself. Otherwise, parts of yourself chip away, and you become blunt.

The day after next, at 12:52am

It was a long day of eating out, (no power, can’t make coffee, cant’ use microwave etc.), going out and coming back to a dark home, doing things in the dark, showering in the dark and finally on the bed. A cold bed 😦

Any more thoughts? mm… well. Ah. I’m sick of saying it.