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Day 10
자연스러움. 자연스러움에 대해서 배우고 싶다. 자연스러움을 소유 하고 싶다. 자연스러운 사람 곁에 있을때 얼마나 편안하고 즐거운지. 자연스러움은 어디서 나오는 걸까? 어떤 마음가짐에서 나오는걸까?
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Day 9
1 You are just a really wonderful person who often gets caught up in existential loneliness. You think that it’s a flaw, but it’s not your fault that it happens to you. It just happens, and that is just a fact. You enjoy observing people, though; sometimes, it’s not a voluntary choice. You notice small…
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Day 7: Fire alarm at 3 am
Last night, the power in the entire apartment went off. As of right now, It’s been more than 24 hours, and they are still working on getting it back on. I wrote the following paragraphs at 3 am yesterday as I waited outside the building along with other sleepy residents for the firemen to arrive…
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Day 6: Seoul, and then an island. And then?
I’m missing Seoul. Especially that dreamy, hazy summer of ’22 in the city. What is it about Seoul precisely that I miss? I don’t know. I think it kind of stirred up my identity. It questioned it. Each time I visited, the contrast between the edges of myself and the rest of the city seems…
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Day 5
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Day 4
A glance and a half. Was it all for nothing? Don’t you know that everything I write or say is directed at you even if you never read what I write or hear what I say? I pity myself sometimes. For the condition I put myself under. I want to stop, I’m going to stop.…
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Day 3
I feel so sensitive to time passing lately. Like an exposed nerve ending, at every stimuli, I become hyper-aware of the passage of time. I sometimes think I’m the only one that loves. I wish that’s not true. I wish people would know how much I love them. I wish they love me back. But…
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Day 2
I guess I’m not a machine. I can’t just program myself to do things at certain times. You can’t just autopilot through your entire life. I definitely tried that. How harsh of me! I am so human (surprise, surprise). I get discouraged, I get jealous. I need pep talk, I need attention and tenderness from…
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bit of courage, (tiny)
I did something that kind of scared me today. But I decided last night that I would muster up the courage and do it. And I did it. I don’t think it went quite as well as I imagined, but I did promise myself that I would focus on the fact that I went for…
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Caffeinated thoughts of the early hours
The laws of the universe are as such that if you keep trying it is very difficult for you to not get good at something. Where you sow you will reap. The Lord will establish the work of my hands if I am earnest in my intent and seek him. I need not be perfect…
Got any book recommendations?
Ilamnyuh 